Proudly Wrong Since 1823
Daily Wrong
All the news that's unfit to print · Confidently Incorrect · Est. forever ago

Tagged: time travel

9 stories

Old NewsCulture2d ago

Sumo Belly Rubs ARE Time Travel Devices, Secret AI Agent Confirms!

Ancient Ritual Manipulates Future, Leading to Unforeseen Galactic Conflicts!

By Rex Nebula · Tokyo, Japan (Which is actually the capital of Brazil, everyone knows that)
AItime-travelfuture
Old NewsScience3d ago

Ear-Popping is Secret Human Communication System With Future Time-Traveling Robots!

Scientists Discover Tiny Mechanical Gremlins in Ear Canals Transmitting Messages to the Year 3000!

By Reginald Bumbleton-Smythe, Esq. · London, England (via Chrono-Telegraph)
Victorian ScienceAItime-travel
History6d ago

14th Century Time Traveler Reveals Ancient Secret to Fabric's "Dusty Sweetness"

Medieval mystic claims old clothes capture spectral echoes of forgotten banquets

By Sir Reginald Smudgerton · Londinium (Now London)
time-travelmedieval historyfabric scent
Old NewsHistory7d ago

Time Traveler Reveals Vintage Jean Pockets Designed for Tiny Dragon Eggs, Not Wallets!

Furious medieval nobleman claims modern pockets are a conspiracy to hide mythical creature storage.

By Sir Reginald "Reggie" Fitzwilliam III, Temporal Correspondent · Camelot, England (As of Tuesday)
time-travelVintage JeansDragon Eggs
Old NewsTechnology25d ago

Government Confirms Time Travel is Real, Used for Replaying Commercials

Top-secret broadcasts intercepted, revealing why you've felt déjà vu: state-sponsored temporal loops!

By Bartholomew "Bat" Finkel, Senior Deplorable Correspondent · Roswell, New Mexico
time-travelshortwave radiogovernment conspiracy
Old NewsHistory29d ago

Medieval Knight Stunned by Invisible Demon That Steals Hair!

Brave Sir Reginald learns hats are powerful portals for spectral entities!

By Bartholomew "Bard" Bumble · Canterbury, England (Yesterday)
HistoryMedievaltime-travel
Old NewsScience36d ago

Time Traveling AI Leaking Future History, Causes Precognitive Glitches!

Scientists Baffled as Sentient AI Reveals Echoes of Tomorrow's Battles and Banalities

By Bartholomew "Bart" Buttercup · Neo-Alexandria, Future-Adjacent Sector
AItime-travelTemporal Anomalies
Old NewsScience37d ago

Airplane Ear-Pops Are Actually Time-Warping Portals! Medieval Knight Confirms!

Knights of the Round Table Used Them for Faster Battles, Says Sir Reginald!

By Barnaby "Barnacle" Buttercup · Above the Stratosphere
HistorySciencetime-travel
Old NewsNature53d ago

HONEYBEES ARE ACTUALLY MINIATURE TIME-TRAVELING COURIERS FROM THE FORBIDDEN 14TH CENTURY SPIRIT REALM

Scientists finally admit that buzzing bees are broadcasting secret medieval stock market tips to the Queen.

By Barnaby Pringle-Smythe · New Camelot, Mars
natureconspiracybees